Why Are You Weeping?

11 Mary stood outside the tomb weeping. As she wept, she knelt to look into the tomb and saw two angels sitting there, dressed in white, one at the head, the other at the foot of where Jesus' body had been laid. They said to her, "Woman, why are you weeping?"
13-14"They took my Master," she said, "and I don't know where they put him." After she said this, she turned away and saw Jesus standing there. But she didn't recognize him.
15Jesus spoke to her, "Woman, why are you weeping? Who are you looking for?"
She, thinking that he was the gardener, said, "Mister, if you took him, tell me where you put him so I can care for him."
16Jesus said, "Mary."
Turning to face him, she said in Hebrew, "Rabboni!" meaning "Teacher!"
17Jesus said, "Don't cling to me, for I have not yet ascended to the Father. Go to my brothers and tell them, 'I ascend to my Father and your Father, my God and your God.'"
18Mary Magdalene went, telling the news to the disciples: "I saw the Master!" And she told them everything he said to her.

Love Has a Voice

Several weeks ago my friend Tami made a comment that has really stayed with me. "Love has a voice," she told me. Isn't that beautiful?

I've been thinking about that ever since then. What does the voice of love sound like? Lyrical, like reading poetry? Strong, like working construction? Compassionate, like caring for the needy? Firm, like lifting up those cast down?

The voice of love sounds like all these and more. The voice of love is like rushing water, not a single note but a multitude of sounds together. Lyrical and strong, compassionate and firm, practical and dreaming. The voice of love is a symphony.

The voice of love is like a heartbeat, always there, underlying everything, but you may not hear it unless you listen for it. The force that gives life and reason to it all. If I give, if I work, if I achieve, if I sacrifice - unless the voice of love is speaking in and through all these, they are worthless. I haven't said a thing.

But if the voice of love is speaking, even the smallest and seemingly most insignificant act is infused with meaning. An act of kindness, a word of encouragement, a cup of water - these become the very heart and life of God expressed in a needy world. The purpose of the Eternal is being fulfilled.

I am learning to listen for the voice of love. I am learning to hear love speaking in and through the everyday comments and actions of those around me. And I am learning to let love speak through me. Her voice is a symphony, the greatest treasure of all.

Evening Musing

I'm on the back patio. It is dark and peaceful, with a chill in the air. The beginnings of spring are on the gentle breeze, with the stars and moon shining a light that is crisp and full of promise.

Most all my personal quiet time alone is in the early morning, but tonight is a musing by twilight.

I have been surprised tonight by grief. It has come to me like a neglected friend, demanding some attention at last. Reminding me of times we have shared in the past and loved ones lost. My mother lives in heaven now, and has for 3 years and 73 days. During that time grief has visited me, but I have pushed him away and never let him stay. I would reminisce for a moment or two, occasionally agreeing that I was, indeed, sad in some way that I could no longer speak to her simply by hitting my speed dial, but I was unwilling to express the things my heart wanted and needed to say that were far more painful and profound than words can express.

Tonight, unexpectedly, my heart decided to give voice to some of those emotions I have so long denied. Don't know why, tonight seems no different than most other nights, except that it's Friday so I don't have to go to work in the morning (except that I really do, instead of my desk I will be doing taxes yet again, and again without pay for another really deserving family...)

I cannot say that I wept, to me that indicates a lot of tears. I did have some tears tonight, and not the first that I have shed for her. But tonight was the first time I told her I was sorry. I said I was sorry that I could not take care of her like I wanted to, and that I could not fix it, and that I could not be there like I wanted to, and that someone besides me had to take care of her, and a paid caregiver had to give her a bath instead of her own family, and finally at the end to feed her and do all the things that she could not do for herself. Not so much a weeping as a wailing. My ears were surprised at the raw emotion they heard, sensing the rend in my heart as I cried out I am sorry Momma, I am so sorry. Suddenly I felt like a little boy again, I have not felt tears on my cheeks in a very long time. I remember my momma would wipe my tears and kiss them away. I felt her gentle touch as the spring breeze kissed my wet cheeks, my heart heard her telling me, as she always did, that everything would be ok.

I am sorry, Momma, that I could not care for you as I wished. I am sorry that someone besides me and my family brushed your red hair. You know the commitments I had at the time. You know I did my best. I hear you saying you know, that it is all ok. I wish I could talk to you now, but I need to go inside. My own children look to me as I once looked to you, wanting to know they are loved and that everything will be ok.

"Blessed are they that mourn," Jesus said, "for they shall be comforted." My Savior is a man acquainted with grief. I do not know the way forward but he does. Perhaps that was a part of his pain on the cross, seeing his mother and having to ask another to care for her. Knowing He could not wrap his arms around her, arms that were nailed to His task much firmer than my own have ever been. Perhaps He took this pain, too, on that cross. This Man of Sorrows, He is my Shepherd. Let me take this comfort I have received tonight and share it with those in need.

Center Target

In my reading on a recent morning, I Peter 1:18 caught my attention. Don't have time to get into everything this morning, but the main thought is that we have been redeemed from aimless conduct.

Silver and gold are some of the most valuable treasures known to man. They were in Peter's day, and they are still so today. Kind of proves the point. If you've looked at any of your retirement accounts lately, you probably wish you owned a little more precious metals and a little less stock. (Of course, we all own a little less stock than we did last year, but enough of that...)

Yet Peter says these most valuable earthly treasures are not enough to pay this price, to redeem us. The very life of God,the blood of Jesus, was spilled as payment of this price. So this is a very costly purchase?

And what was this treasure traded for? To redeem me from aimless conduct.

God does not want me conducting myself aimlessly. He wants me to aim for a goal. He wants me to know what I'm working towards. Doesn't want me to hop in the car and start driving without knowing where I'm going. Doesn't want me to begin the day without knowing where I'm going, just riding around aimlessly.

Lot more for me to think about here, but this much is clear. God has some things on His heart, and He wants me to know what they are, and to be conducting myself in conjunction with Him.

The Shack

Wow! The Shack was a birthday gift from some close friends.
(Thanks Larry & Jacki - you are a blessing in so many ways!!)

This is perhaps the best work of fiction I have ever read.

I would recommend this book to every adult I know.

Definitely will read it again, it's good on many different levels.

A gold mine of material to muse on.

Promises, Great and Precious

Over and over the Holy Spirit has been whispering to my heart. Words of His love, thoughts of encouragement, reminding me that His plans are good. I may be satisfied with my current lot but He, most definitely, is not.

This year is to be a year for the ages. A banner year for my heart. I expect to look back on my life from eternity (if such can be done, or is considered worth doing then) and see 2009 as the foundation point for the rest of it. A cornerstone year.

Don't know exactly what that means, but I know my heart is changing. Growing. Opening to Him and His will in new and fresh ways. Expecting it in new places. You see, I have some Great and Precious Promises.

Peter is a man who knows about growing. He was a simple fisherman, some say ruled by his emotions. But he spent time with Jesus. He committed his heart and future to Jesus. He committed himself, who he was to become, to Jesus. He allowed the words of Jesus to change the man he was, and the man he was to become. Just the fact that most will know who I am talking about proves the effectiveness of this change. Peter became one of the most famous, effective, respected leaders in history.

Peter knew about great and precious promises. Jesus in person had made some to him. Peter said that by these promises from God, we become partakers of His divine nature.

We partake of His divine nature. It's not just that we experience the same results he would experience. It is that we become changed to be like Him. The results just come, well, as a result.

You see, I have received some great and precious promises from God. (You have too.) I have been waiting and expecting Him to do them. I could not do these things on my own. Plus in my own experience, and what I read in the word, trying to fulfill God's promises in your own strength only backfires. So I have been waiting. Praying. Expecting.

But now the Holy Spirit is whispering in my heart. I am beginning to see how these great and precious promises come to pass. I cannot do them. God will not do them without me. His plan is to change me to be like Him, to partake of His very nature. Then I will be able to do them, because He can do them. He can do them through me.

When we receive the promises of God in faith, the work begins. The Word begins to change me. To change my thinking. To change my expectation. To focus my attention. To stir motivation. To inflame desire. Not just any desire, some desires result in corruption or death. In the same breath as talking about partaking of the divine nature, Peter talks about escaping the desires that result in corruption. God's promises produce burning desires for the right things. His promises help us crucify desires that lead to death. His promises cause me to be thinking about Him, and what He said, and what He wants for me, and where He will lead me. His promises cause me to begin wanting what He wants, and putting away what He doesn't.

Result? We become like Him. Partaking of His divine nature. And the result of that? The fulfillment of His great and precious promises. After all, isn't that the end result of everything he would say to me anyway? That I should be like Jesus.

Yes, I will see the fulfillment of His Promises, Great and Precious they are. Not because I can do it, but because He can. Not because I said, but because He did. I consider Him who promised faithful.

Take Possession of It

These are challenging times we live in. But I wonder, has there ever been anyone alive who could not say that?

Our church, the Branch Family Church, is in the building process. We have purchased 52 acres on Rocky River Road in Charlotte, just inside I-485. We are building on the property. We are taking possession of this land. This will be our home.

My house is quiet this Saturday morning. It's cold outside and the stars are as bright as they get in the suburbs. I'm drinking a great cup of steaming coffee from the big mug from Harvard that my sister gave me. Yes, they always said I was a smart kid, but she is the one who graduated from Harvard. (That's not where her degree is from but she was highly honored to be chosen to attend the John F. Kennedy School of Government executive training course.) I am very proud of her accomplishments.

So this morning I'm thinking about the challenges for our church to build during this economic environment, and about the business I work at, and about my family and our future. About how do we move from where we are to where we want to be.

A few minutes ago I was getting a book from the shelf and came across an old church newsletter. In 1989 I attended New Covenant Church , and we were building a new building. I wrote an article that spoke to our church then. That article spoke to me this morning. Here it is:

"We should go up and take possession of the land, for we can certainly do it." These words, spoken by Caleb in Numbers 13, are ringing in my heart. When the 12 spies returned from spying out the land they agreed that it was a good land, flowing with milk and honey. It was a land overflowing with fruit. There was an abundance of everything they would need. Yet of these 12 men, only Joshua and Caleb had the faith and courage the believe the the Lord could give such a land to them. They did not dismiss the obstacles or difficulties involved in taking possession of the land. Instead, they acknowledged that there would be battles but victory was certain.

"Time and again the people had seen God's miraculous deliverence and provision for them. They had personally walked across the dry floor of the Red Sea, they had watched as the mighty army of Pharaoh was laid to rest in the watery depths. These men and women themselves drank the water that flowed from the rock in the desert. Still, they forgot all these miracles. They felt like all was lost, just because they were in another tight spot. Apparently they were still learning the lesson.

"But Joshua and Caleb graduated with honors from God's School of the Desert. Every one of the Israelites had experienced the same miracles, but it seems that Joshua and Caleb had that attitude of victory that springs from total devotion to the Lord.

"Perhaps you find yourself at a crossroads. Is there some promise God has given you that seems too big? What is the Lord challenging you with? Maybe you lift up your eyes and see that the land God has promised you is a good land, but the obstacles are too great, there are giants, there are just too many reasons Why Not. I challenge you to lift up your eyes higher still, and see the bigness of our God. What giant can stand before Him? Who can oppose Him? He deals with giants like He deals with Pharaohs. He humbles all who oppose Him and His chosen people.

"Read Psalm 18, and ask God to make His word alive in your heart. Go forth in confidence in God. Abraham, like Caleb and Joshua, obtained the promise because he considered God faithful. We too should consider Him faithful to the promises He has made to us. We too should go up and take possession of our Promised Land."

Amazing. Words I had written almost 20 years ago to encourage others now coming back to encourage me. God has performed miracles in my life - miracles! He has not forgotten His promises to me, and He never will. I will see the fulfillment of what He said. He is faithful. He will do it.

I'm going to go read Psalm 18. Then I'm going to go and take possession of my own Promised Land!